Familiarity

Many people might be familiar with the concept of a friendly neighbourhood auto driver! He is the one, near your house, who you know and who knows your office and other familiar visiting places.
I have 1 such auto-thatha (grandpa!), who stays near my mom's place. Moreover he is dad-approved! :-D

I made an impromptu outing to my parents' house this week. On the rare occasion that I was there without the kiddo, and having spent nearly 2 hrs on the road earlier, in a cab, I did not want to go back home in another long cab ride. As luck would have it, Dad, who obviously volunteered to send me off, found that auto-thatha and after some ooT-aaytha exchanges, I was off.

The driver, knowing the route, went to my area effortlessly. As I gave the final left-hogi, right-hogi instructions, I reached home. After settling the bill, he asked (or rather told) 'Mane change maaDidhira?!' (You have changed the house?!).

Oh, also, I actually saw a golden Audi on the way. Yes, not the Vitara Brezza golden color, but having a gold-plated look. It looked terrible!

An Experiment named Parenting

Here are some of my honest, albeit randomly ordered, thoughts and opinions about parenting, some personally experienced and some observations. Some simple, some complex!
Over the coming years, am sure, I will learn new things and be exposed to different situations and will have to rack my brain as to how to deal with those, but that is a worry for another time! :)

Parenting is an extremely personal and unique journey. It cannot be duplicated, cannot be modelled on other's journey, and it should be done on your own (with your spouse, if you have one).

Difference of opinion with your spouse is extremely common. Having a stand is good, but negotiating and coming to a common ground is beneficial to the child, in the long run. Constant difference of opinion will tire not only you, but your child as well!

Some mistakes in judgement happen. This, even when people willingly correct it, sometimes, even before the mistake becomes visible. But if you don't go through it, how will you be sure? It might even turn out to be right.
You never know, unless you try.

Talk to your child, a lot! Keep the communication open. I like to give my child the benefit of doubt. I like hearing his views, thoughts and provide my views and theories to him. I assure him that it's ok to feel or behave a certain way, even if everyone else is against it. It just reinforces that it is ok to be different, to have an opinion and be vocal about it!

Love your child. Respect your child. Don't humiliate or chid him in public, unless, you are very sure he was wrong, if so, then do educate him gently. But do not be tolerant of consistent bad behavior though.

Actively use 'Please', 'thank you', 'sorry' and encourage the child to do so too.

Try to avoid the social/school pressure of the child excelling academically, if you can. Constantly encourage your child to do his best, and then forget about the results. This is true for all endeavors, not academic alone.

Let your child watch cartoons/songs/nature,animal and cosmos videos etc, under your guidance, for maybe half an hr a day. It won't harm them too much, but will help them expand their knowledge as well.

Invest in a hobby or class (music/karate etc), but not too many, the child should be able to get some playing time. Make exercise (physical - playing/cycling etc and/or mental - board games, painting etc) a daily habit. But its also ok to take a break and relax on Sundays.

Be creative and explore fun ways of spending time together with the child.

Love and Respect your spouse, be vocal about it, your child will be immensely benefitted by it.

Never tag your happiness to your child/('s). Rather, never make your child as your only source of happiness. The burden that they will subconsciously carry through their life, might/will affect them negatively.

Be happy in your own space, don't tie it with your child's. Eat chocolates when your child can't. Go out and explore when your child won't. It is as important as, say, giving away your last piece of cake to your child without a moment's hesitation or playing hide-n-seek by hiding and seeking at the same place, multiple times, without making it look like a chore, enjoy these moments when you can.

Don't let guilt (internal and external) mar your perspective and stability. Be brave, be your own person. Your child might sulk or not like it now, but gradually and surely, your child will respect that and when time comes, would definitely be his/her own person easily, probably without the internal struggle you have had to endure.

At the end of it all, there will still be imperfections, I-could-have-done-better feelings, but take a deep breath, relax and remind yourself that it's ok, really ok!

Katheyondha Helidhe....

The new breed of directors/actors in Kannada movie industry are truly making a mark. Be it Lucia, RangiTaranga, U-Turn or for that matter, a college story like Kirik Party. The freshness and innovation that these guys brought to the table, is what makes them stand apart. There have been other good movies - GBSM, a few arty movies, but since I have not watched them, I am not talking about them.

 I read a review of Kirik Party by Rangan (link) and what he says is true! This movie indeed was a musical! Be it the slow waltz (while the fight happens), or breaking into a song when the guys are suspended. Brilliant take. I did like the background score of Ulidavaru Kandante too, but this movie takes the cake! (hey, I am turning into a rhyming expert!)

The tunes are so infectious (The trumpet in Kaagadada Doniyalli or the chorus in Belageddu, Katheyondha, for eg). Nice work by the music director - Anjaneesh Loknath.
I esp. loved the hat-tip to Ravichandran and Hamsaleka in "Hey, who are you" song! Took me back to the time of Prema-Loka, Ranadheera. :)
The lyrics of the songs are also lovely. The use of some of the bhaava geetes ( Toogu Mancha and Neecha Nalige(?)) is refreshing.
The singers have done a great job, some established and some new names, a good mix altogether.

 Wrt the movie, the last part was a tad long and the plot seemed lost. A tighter second half would have made it even more enjoyable!

Check out the album in Saavn, or better still, watch the movie in the theatre (It has English Subtitles!) and then listen to the songs. They grow on you that way.

The fallen gate

Dusk was setting in. The gate of a nearby park had fallen and everyone had to enter the park trampling on the fallen gate. A guy, an elderly couple and I were the only people walking in the park. 

I noticed that 4 workers had started to fix the gate. They lifted it up, tried to hold it steady and were figuring out how to put it in place. 

After a few more rounds, I wanted to go home. I stopped near the workers, asked them (in Kannada, translated here): "Will this take more time?" No response. The workers refused to acknowledge my presence.

The elderly couple, who were right behind me, stopped, and the lady asked the workers "Can we go from here?" Again, a stoic silence. A pause, and then the elderly man, calls out authoritatively - "Aye! Can we go from here?" Pat came the reply ' No Sir!'.  

I continued walking and exited the park out of the other gate. 

Stuff kids think and say!

On one lazy weekend, Sid and I were reading in the balcony and I happened to see a Kite (mostly) and showed the same to Sid. He asked me which bird that was, and I said "Mostly Kite, don't know for sure". He, excitedly, quips: "Mamma, do you have any bird-scanner like QR-scanner? (I had introduced it to him, because of some kiddy game app) You know, we could point the phone camera to the bird, and the app can scan the bird and tell us what bird it is."

I was dumbstruck! What a brilliant idea. There might be something similar wrt image-search, but live scanning and searching sounds interesting!

Waiting to see such an app now! Remember, you heard it first here!!

In Dino..

After a terrible 2016, a new year has started. There might be many things that will go wrong and many that might just be perfect, but its another chance to change for the good! As usual, there are some goals and resolutions, but who knows how much can be accomplished. Give it your best though, will ya?

Some thoughts and happenings, that individually were too small for a post and too long for a tweet, had been housed in the back of my mind for some time, and now, I have listed it out here, as a collective, so that it doesn't slip away from the already cluttered, confused mind.

• Had high hopes on Prof.Bharadwaj's tryst with the present, but was throughly disappointed. I am speaking, of course, of 'Immortal' by Krishna Udayashankar. After the brilliant, excellent, amazing (and other such superlative adjectives) 'The Aryavarta Chronicles', I expected too much perhaps. It ends up like 'Indiana Jones', which in the Professor's word, was actually not supposed to be! I was reminded of 'The Emperor's Riddles', which I did not like either. Although, both gave a lot of materials, history, mythology, places to learn about, so can't complain much!?

• One more book that I read and was not impressed by was ' One Indian Girl' by Chethan Bhagat. There are some parts, that do portray a lady's plight, but there is nothing new that the book offers, and looks to be mostly a script ready to get some or the other Bollywood studio's nod!

• I did catch up on short stories though. Sherlock Holmes and Hercule Poirot. Ah! What plots and twists. What words, what sentence formations. Brilliant!  Loved them to bits! I did try to read some aloud for Sid though, and he refused to listen. He is happy reading the books he likes. 

• Speaking of Sid, well, he has progressed to reading on his own now, and the bedtime and weekend afternoon readings has become a breeze! I have, sneakily, made a deal that I will read 1 story and he gets to pick and read whatever he wants. Those are the most peaceful minutes of the day! :-D Moreover, I get to read in that gap as well! 

• I did not watch as many movies as I wanted to in 2016! I flare up when I see the nominations, that have started for the Annual award ceremonies. Not because of the choices, but I must have watched probably only a couple of them, that's all! Oh, the horror!! I don't think I can get myself to watch any of the award ceremonies this year! 

• 2016 has also been a year of great highs and lows. I, who has claimed, never to have caught a fever, as far as I remember, finally caught one! The family too kept falling sick. Hope we fare better this year.

• Arijit Singh sounds constipated now-a-days - 'Channa mere ya' and a couple of more recent ones!  'Ae dil hain mushkil' title track sounds fine though. Compare some of the recent ones to a 'Phir le aaya Dil' or a 'Laal ishq' and you can notice the difference. Or is it deliberate, to sound sad, perhaps? 

• Speaking of Phir le aaya dil, it still sounds magical! I am not sure if I loved the song instantly (kiddo wanted the Barfi songs on loop) or loved it after I saw the video. I sometimes think it is, indeed, the latter. The silent emotions that are expressed in the eyes of the leads are just so beautiful! Well-directed and emoted!  

          Check it out here:

Reassurance

"I want my mummy, I miss my mummy!"

That wasn't Sid. That was me! On a cold rainy night, just while sleeping, I declared that. Suddenly!

You know what my 4 and a half year old did at that point??
He called my mom. On an imaginary phone. "Hello Ajji..Ajji.. Ya come soon ok. Bye". Next minute he was consoling me "Mamma, she will come ok. Don't worry." Then he gave me the tightest hug ever, smiled a dazzling smile and went back to sleep!
Speechless and so so PROUD!

Life in words and pictures

Sid, who was playing with toy cars (He has developed a sudden interest in them!), dashed two of them. Since no one was watching, he excitedly said 'Mamma, see the cars dashed, shall I show you a replay?'
'Replay thorsla?' has become a favorite now. Even if he skids on a mat, he wants to show a replay.

He is also drawing away to glory too, from multi-color dog like unicorns to aliens to abstracts! Here he is, drawing on the street, in the recently held 'Open Street' in HSR Layout.

This one's him trying to be 'Mister Maker', with his own set, complete with props, colors and books!!

No two meanings about it!

We use so many words in different contexts to produce totally different meanings, that it is quite a shock when someone (read the kiddo) understands it at face value. Gives a good perspective on things and sometimes, it is funny too. Have noted down some recent conversations, that I remember, below. Damn, I should note them down immediately, else will lose them in the sands of time! ;-)

Sid negotiating something with me.
Me: Nice try!!
Sid: No Mama, bad try.

Me to Josh: You get the point don't you?
Sid (interrupting): I get more points, not you!

Niceness of it all!

Usually when I am making tea or chopping/cooking something, Sid insists he 'helps', so I make him sit on the counter top and give him important tasks. Like passing me the tea powder box or sugar box (of course, 1 spoon has to go into his tummy!) and he gives them to me and has that look of completing an important assignment! Its fun, and oh, he gets to see how to cook too!

So sometime this week, I was trying to create my own breakfast cereal mix, and Sid insisted on seeing it. I added some cranberries to store-bought wheat flakes, and he wanted it, of course. Then I started cutting walnuts, chopping almonds and he wanted them all. I gave him a few pieces and continued the chopping.
Out of the blue, he says, 'Mamma, you are a nice girl'. :-)
And for that he got a big bear hug!!